rules & regulations

“Rules? We don’t need no stinkin’ rules!”

Today I got into a bit of a Facebook fight.

Well, it was more that I shared an unpopular opinion. But it was on a big blogger’s Facebook page. And there were other big bloggers chiming in and sharing their dismay with my opinion.

So while it wasn’t really a fight, I don’t think that my opinion was terribly popular.

What was it all about?

Said big blogger offered a helpful “tip” suggesting that if you have a link party that you shouldn’t invite others to your link party in another blogger’s comments section or by sending them an email invite.

Things like this were said on that Facebook thread…

“If you have to beg others to join…you shouldn’t be having a link party.”

“Really the blog world doesn’t need another party. Why don’t we just put time and effort into the already established ones?”

“If people consider it rude, why would you want to continue to do it just because you don’t think it is? What should matter to you is how your comment is PERCEIVED, not how you meant it.”

“If you are offending 10 or 15 or even 20 people that are participating in this conversation, imagine the sheer magnitude of how many others you are ticking off that AREN’T here reading this.”

There were a handful of us who talked about being open to this type of invite when offered up sincerely, but it seems that a number of people really want to develop this blog etiquette, which to me looks an awful lot like a rigid set of rules of engagement to play in their blog world.

Like a movie star complaining about evils of the fame and fortune that they’ve gained, these big bloggers complaining about comments, email, and people promoting to them seemed disingenuous.

Frankly, I found it condescending and offensive. A grown-up version of the limits set by the queen bees in high school. And contrary to what the Internet is all about. You know, the Internet…the place where you can create an online world, made up entirely of computer code.  That same place made into what it is today by a bunch of computer geeks wearing Def Leppard t-shirts and living in their moms’ basements. The very essence of which is diametrically opposed to rules and regulations.

But a number of these blogger ladies think that it’s their job to “teach” newer bloggers their desired rules of engagement. Teaching them that they should concern themselves with how they are perceived by others. This really rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe it looks like sour grapes, since they have giant followings and I don’t. If that’s how it looks, so be it.

Some of the comments were mean spirited. Some of them were of the “I got mine, now you need to work hard to get yours too” variety. And some were downright dysfunctional, if you ask me.

To say that we need to try to figure out how every reader “perceives” us is dysfunctional. Forget about bloggers and the Internet for a minute. If we are constantly trying to figure out how others view us and what they think of us, we will never be happy as individuals, nor are we likely to do what it is that satisfies us, because we will constantly be dancing to somebody else’s tune. Frankly, I don’t think this is a good way to live a meaningful life.

But back to blogging and the Internet…

The beauty of the Internet is that you can create the very world that you want to live in. If you don’t want to get a certain type of comments, perfect, moderate your comments. If you don’t like the comments or email that you receive, you are always free to use the ever-popular delete key. In fact, some of you may not like what I’m saying here, and I will take the luxury of using the aforementioned tools to eliminate comments or email that I find offensive.

I’ve been thinking a lot about creativity and blogging lately. Been thinking about how to express myself uniquely in my home as well, which is my creative palette that I share here.

My philosophy about the Internet extends to my home. The possibilities are endless. I don’t just want to copy what I see in magazine or on Pinterest or on other blogs. What I really want to do is stretch my own creativity to the nth degree and create something new and unique in my home. Something that I love. That’s what I want to share on my blog. And hopefully as a reader of this blog you might find a shred or two of inspiration and will take that to your home and create something new and unique in your world.

So instead of worrying about rules and regulations, whether they’re about blogging or design, let’s throw caution to the wind and expand our horizons, think outside the box, and challenge ourselves to stretch our creativity. In our hearts, in our minds, in our blogs, and especially in our homes.

In many ways, the Internet carries the essence of creativity. Make of it what you will.  Be kind and be a good person. That will mean something different to every person, but do your best.

And for the love of all things holy, let’s spend our time thinking about new ways to stretch and be creative, rather than thinking of ways to reign in creativity.